| Author: | Evelyn |
|---|---|
| Tune: | “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” by Johnny Marks |
| Year: | 2003 |
Boris the red-eyed wraith horse (wraith horse)
Had some creepy glowing eyes (like a Balrog)
And if you ever see him (see him)
Say hello and he’ll say “Hi.” (with molasses)
All of the other wraith horse (wraith horse)
Used to snort and shake their manes (ornery grump-heads)
They never let poor Boris (Boris)
Bear a wraith on Mordor’s plains (rather dusty)
Then one dark and scary eve
Sauron came to call (bwa-ha-ha)
He said naught ’cos eyes can’t talk
But Witchy got him saddled up
Now all the other wraith horse (wraith horse)
Watch him screech away in glee (eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!)
Boris the red-eyed wraith horse (wraith horse)
Unfortunately drowned will be (like Drogo)
Unfortunately droowwwned will beeeeee.
| Author: | Mercuria |
|---|---|
| Tune: | “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Johnny Marks |
| Year: | 2003 |
Rockin’ around the mallorn tree
in the cities of the Elves
(soon to fade with the waning-of-the-Elven-rings
but do not grieve yourselves)
Rockin’ around the mallorn tree
and the Fellowship’s here too
Later we’ll have some lembas bread
and predict our certain doom (thanks, Galadriel)
You will get an irritated feeling when you hear
voices singing, “La la lally!
Come stay in Imladris Valley!”
Rockin’ around the mallorn tree
in the last days of our age
Every Elf dancing merrily
and barely-concealing-feelings-of-intense-regret-and-RAAAAAGE
| Author: | Hawkelf |
|---|---|
| Tune: | “Jingle Bells” by James Lord Pierpont |
| Year: | 2003 |
Jingle bells, Sauron smells
Gwaihir layed an egg!
Gandalf’s cart broke a wheel,
And Éowyn the Witch King did slay!
Hey!
| Author: | Fawkes |
|---|---|
| Tune: | “The Twelve Days of Christmas” (trad. English) |
| Year: | 2003 |
On the first day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
One Ring to rule them all
On the second day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the third day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the fourth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the fifth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the sixth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the seventh day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Seven Dwarven rings
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the eighth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Eight Elven broaches
Seven Dwarven rings
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the ninth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Nine Fellowship members
Eight Elven broaches
Seven Dwarven rings
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the tenth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Ten thousand orcs
Nine Fellowship members
Eight Elven broaches
Seven Dwarven rings
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Eleven Elven cloaks
Ten thousand orcs
Nine Fellowship members
Eight Elven broaches
Seven Dwarven rings
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all
On the twelfth day of Christmas, my Precious gave to me:
Twelve evil schemes
Eleven Elven cloaks
Ten thousand orcs
Nine Fellowship members
Eight Elven broaches
Seven Dwarven rings
Six pretty elves
Five crazy wizards!
Four drunken hobbits
Three Elven rings
Two hunky men
And One Ring to rule them all!